God, is it ever killing me.
According to Duotrope, I'm waiting on responses for eleven submissions. Of those, one is for a podcast, four are for print anthologies, one is a contest entry and the other five are for various online and print magazines. I'm also waiting to hear back about my novel query, which I expect will take quite some time.
I think the anthology submissions are killing me the most. I love the idea of being part of a print collection, one piece of a badass group. I can certainly handle rejection, but just the thought of being included in other print collections sends me running as soon as my computer makes its new message notification blip. I keep hoping for word to arrive, but it's mostly been junk mail and things that I could care less about, which somehow makes the waiting seem both longer and much worse than it normally would.
Today I did something I should have done a long time ago. I got rid of most of those mass mailings, unsubscribing as soon as they hit my inbox. I feel bad for all of the nonprofit organizations that send me messages, but seeing as how I'm unemployed and just scraping by it's not like they're going to be able to wring donations out of my sappy, bleeding heart at the moment. The rest of the mailings, for bookstores I don't normally buy from or clothing shops I rarely frequent, were never much more than a distraction anyway, and I don't need to be getting my hopes up over crap like that.
And now the waiting game goes on, only with fewer false alarms.
One good thing about this, though, is that I checked my overall performance on Duotrope while tallying up my submissions. I've got a higher than average acceptance rate going at the moment, almost at fifty percent. Not too shabby.